New Year, New Me. Sort of.

I've always been a big idea kind of person. Graduate college a year early so I can start my career at 20? Easy. Run a half marathon after attending 4 out of 18 trainings while being as round as an actual butterball? Did it & have the medal to prove it. Spend an entire year without buying any new clothes, except that $6 football shirt from the drugstore? Owned it.

I must have used all of my brilliance on the aformentioned ideas because as we start the second full week of 2014, I still can't decide on a resolution. Here are the bright ideas that I've talked myself out of so far:

1.)Give up caffeine. As a Starbucks and Diet Mountain Dew addict, I know that I would be much healthier if I could start an addiction to water. But water doesn't turn me into a nice person the way 20 ounces of the nectar of the gods can. Gateway drug, schmateway drug. The compromise I've come to is that if caffeine single handedly keeps me married, employed, and with friends while simultaneously keeping me away from heroin, I'm going to call it a win.

2.)Work out more. Again, I know, health benefits. And the gym my husband frequents has televisions attached to the machines. I would LOVE to work out more, but 1.) I don't like sweating, 2.) Watching television is much more comfortable from the couch, and 3.) I don't want to. But I'd still like six pack abs. Anyone know how to get those without setting my lungs on fire?

3.)Stay up later. I love sleep. I've always loved sleep. And it's a very close second to caffeine on the 'making me a nice person' scale. But I married a man who, unlike me, is not ready to go to sleep every night at 9pm. He usually manages to keep my whining at bay until 10pm, when I physically can't keep my eyes open any longer. In an effort to spend more time with him, I have extended my bedtime. Last night I made it to 10:03pm. Rome wasn't built in a day, people.

4.)Try some new recipes. In preparation for an afternoon of cards with my sisters, I found this seemingly delicious and easy three ingredient recipe on Pinterest, the website that I now refer to as "Liar Liar, Pants on Fire".
Picture on the recipe website:

Picture of my finished product:

5.)Become a spider slayer. Okay, so I was sort of forced into this one as an arachnid tried to eat me this morning. After half a can of hair spray, an entire roll of toilet paper, a 20 gallon trash bag, and TWO flush attempts, I succeeded. If the Mr. hadn't been sleeping on his only day off, I would have either woken him up and made him do it, or revisited my single days and sucked the eight legged monster up in the vacuum cleaner.

Since I'm fresh out of ideas, this can only mean one thing. Clearly, I'm perfect and there's literally nothing for me to improve. I think I've earned 2014 as a reprieve year. If you have any ideas that aren't hard, uncomfortable, tiring, messy, or gross, I'm all ears for 2015.